Bilingual Love

7 Apr

Let me introduce you to my fiancé:

“Do cats poop and pee out of one butt?” he asked earnestly.

That’s right, not only am I engaged, but it’s to a man who is blissfully ignorant of basic feline anatomy. To be fair, I’ve never seen my cat’s Lady Saint James either, so I guess it’s an easy mistake. BUT STILL. And to be even more fair, English is his 5th language, so I think he’s doing pretty well.

If you were to meet him, you wouldn’t even be able to begin to guess where he’s from. He manages to look vaguely Latino, Middle Eastern, and Asian all in one glance, with an accent that is part Russian and part Borat. I’ve seen the guessing game go on and on and people still have no clue, but are very much intrigued none-the-less.

In reality, he is Persian and from a -stan country that was a part of the former USSR, which accounts for the accent and the dark, mysterious, countenance. Yes, I said a -stan country. I’m not PC.

In our daily life, we come in contact with many extreme cultural differences that range from the adorable to the bizarre. There is the cute habit of wearing a hat to bed when he has a headache. And then there is the eating with your hands thing. I cannot get onboard.

But best of all, are the hilarious misuses of the English language that I try it catalogue to the best of my ability. So please keep your eyes peeled for some more gems.

For now, I will leave it at that because we have to “make a laundry” and that might take a while.


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