Shamus’ Bucket List

24 Nov

Just because it is Thanksgiving (Happy Thanksgiving you all!…I reject ya’ll as a word…I’m looking at you Texas…) doesn’t mean I can’t post anything. In truth, it is harder to find a day where I am more prone to drooling in front of my computer for hours on end so this seems highly appropriate.

This is a post I have been saving up for a long time as I have been trying to test the waters a bit. It is a bucket list I wrote for dear Shamus a few weeks after I met him and I have even shared it with him. For those who laugh at how preposterous it is, I’ll have you know I have showed it to him and he was in agreement, EARNEST AGREEMENT, with everything on the list except for #4, which he saw as a heinous misinterpretation of his sense of style. As always, I speak of Shamus with nothing but tenderness and a slight confused shake of the head. Enjoy…


1. See a little person

2. Eat off the big boy menu

3. Learn what the Latin tattoo on his chest means

4. Meet hair role model and guru, Pauly D

5. Upgrade girlfriend

6. Learn what the f*ck Giligan’s Island is

7. Befriend lesbians

8. Steal Tootsie’s ride and pimp it

9. Be a pimp…

That about sums Shamus up. My favorite one is #1 because my first week at work he came up to me, eyes full of wonder and said, “have you ever seen a midget?!” And I said, “Yeah…and you should probably avoid using that word.” And he said, “Where!?” Well, Shamus, I went to that secret island they are all kept on so they can’t take over the world, obviously.


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